Cute façade hides the fierceness.
Ruler of the house?
Or guardian?
By Sarah ©2022
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Saturday Mix – Lucky Dip, 10 September 2022
Façade
Category: Poetry by Sarah
Happy birthday?
Celebrating
another year
gone by
Yet a thought,
lurking…
“How many more
are mine?”
By Sarah ©2022
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Saturday Mix – Lucky Dip, 13 August 2022
Sunshine
a moment’s escape
I leave it all behind me
to bask in sunshine
By Sarah ©2022
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Photo Challenge #425
Whispering Wind
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Sunday Confessionals: Secrets
I’m not a lady who thinks
all that glitters is gold
So, I don’t believe
everything I’m told.
For I learnt long ago
Words have two meanings,
And you best be sure of
the way that they’re leaning.
We all seek heaven
For the here and the now
But sometimes we miss
The way, and the how.
When I look to the left
See my spirit is leaving,
I must change my path
Despite my heart grieving.
For though I wish to shine
only white light,
I know of my dreams.
I know of what might.
There are those who watch,
And those who do,
and the smoke screen is all
to distinguish the two.
None of us are innocent.
None of us are pure.
We each play our part,
of that I am sure.
And as my transgressions float
Across whispering wind,
They remind me of all
The ways…
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You Never
You never got to fully develop your little body.
But I can picture every detail of your perfectly formed features
As clearly as if you were before me.
You never got to wriggle and squirm in my belly.
But I can still feel you.
A hollowness inside that cannot be filled.
You never got to know my touch or arms holding you tight,
But I caress the memory of you with love,
Hugging my pillow at night, wishing it was you.
You never got to breathe and fill your tiny lungs.
But I take deep breaths to soothe the ache in my heart.
Sighing, for what should have been.
You never got to hear my voice or know me as your mother.
But I speak to you often and the person in the mirror
Wears traces of you, etched in the lines of her face and on the curve of her lips.
You never got to experience happiness, joy, or excitement.
But I lived there during the twelve weeks you were with me.
A brief interlude that was over before it could truly begin.
You never got to experience sadness, loss, or fear
But I know that if you had, I would have always
Picked you up, held you near, and comforted you.
You never got to see your potential fulfilled,
But I dream of the ‘what ifs’ and alternate realities
All the endless possibilities, never realised.
You never got to cry out loud or shed any tears,
But I have shed enough for two lifetimes.
Maybe more.
The scar upon my soul
Is the only proof I have
That you ever even existed.
You will forever be my baby,
Never a toddler, child, teenager, or adult.
The scale of injustice tips me over the edge sometimes.
But in the end, the balance is always maintained.
For everything you never did, I have done for you.
You are gone little one, but never, ever forgotten.
By Sarah ©2022
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Story Swap #2
Never Tell
Do you know, I keep secrets?
And sometimes I lie?
Paint myself in silhouette,
But I’m not sure why.
My shameful heart is burdened.
Don’t know what to do.
To stop myself from spilling
Things that just aren’t true.
Is it because I’m lonely?
Connected; yet lost?
Never knowing what to say,
No matter what the cost.
Awkward and uncomfortable,
I have that in spades.
Desperate to hide my flaws
Yet still, they pervade.
Living in the “ifs” and “whens”
Never now and here.
Slowly dying bit by bit,
Existing in this fear.
Drawing on your sympathy.
Victim card, I’ll play.
You’ll never know the real me
Despite what I say.
Take responsibility?
Nope. I’ll duck and hide.
Unrelenting perfection
My armour; my pride.
You’ll never really notice
The absolute despair
Expectations left wanting
Truly a bugbear.
Maybe I’m an enigma
You take what I sell.
Am I lying even now?
Guess.
I’ll never tell.
By Sarah ©2022
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Saturday Mix – Lucky Dip, 18 June 2022; and Photo Challenge #419
Never Again
A chance.
A hope.
A dare.
A dream.
A disappointment.
A response.
A misunderstanding.
A problem.
A despair.
A regret.
A mess.
A valuable lesson learned.
Never again.
By Sarah ©2022
Indifference
People; do you ever really know?
They disappoint you. So
Keep your expectations low.
When life throws you blow upon blow,
Their silence speaks volumes.
People; do you ever really know?
Indifference. Likes to burn slow.
A simmering glance, a drawn out sigh.
Keep your expectations low.
A strangled plant, it’s hard to grow,
When surrounded by weeds.
People; do you ever really know?
Actions mean more than what you crow,
Beware smiling assassins.
Keep your expectations low.
Guarded I’ll be, loathe to show,
My innermost thoughts lest
People; do you ever really
know?
Keep your expectations low.
By Sarah ©2022
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Saturday Mix – Lucky Dip, 23 April 2022
Dare Not
No one dare say
this is going to be our year
We need to walk in slow
Tread quietly. Tiptoe.
Be cautious
Be respectful
Be prepared
And don’t touch anything
Let 2022 be.
Instead, just hope
Hope it knows the assignment
This year will be its own creation
– whether we like it or not.
By Sarah ©2022
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, First Line Friday – 31 December 2021 and Saturday Mix – 1 January 2022*
*Line poetry contains a hidden message. When the last line of each stanza is read, it forms it’s own mini poem or tale.
Same, Same…yet Different
These sallow skies reveal
Clarion scenes,
as the people
Emerge.
The lockdown is over.
It’s same, same…
Yet different in
This post COVID norm.
Faces beam.
Fresh with verdant hope.
It’s time to live again.
By Sarah ©2021
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Saturday Mix – Same Same But Different
Stars in the Sand
That’s right
I’m the sidekick
Riding the tailcoats
Of those braver than I
Too shy
Too scared
To bare my teeth
And so I smile
Push me around?
You can for a while
I promise, I won’t mind
Instead I smile
My knuckles are white
I grit my teeth
Composure like armour
“Yes,” I smile
My soul awakens
She tries to get out
Shh. No one cares
I falter…
Gently I push
Gently I prod
The cocoon opens wide
And I fly right out
I am bioluminescent
I’m ready.
Projecting my stars in the sand
For all to see
By Sarah ©2021
Carrot Ranch, August 19: Flash Fiction Challenge, and also, Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Take Weaver -19/8
Better
I am better than this.
But still, I slip.
A slip.
A spiral.
Ashamed.
Around in my head I go.
Torturing,
Self-eviscerating
Every. Moment.
Replayed and amplified.
A car crash of thoughts and feelings.
There’s a scrap heap in my mind.
A junk yard fire.
I am better than this.
But it’s got the best of me.
By Sarah ©2021
Dream a Little Dream
There’s a cacophony in my head.
And it won’t go away.
I’ve tried sleeping pills
But there’s no guarantee.
I drop some helium
To cull the birds
Coz the tweets are endless
A faithless dirge
And so I’m held
Too painfully aware.
Is it possible to hope?
Do I dare to care?
This fustian pair
Between my ears
See that decisions are made
for me in arrears
Wishes are portable
This I do know
Thoughts are transferable
Wherever I go.
So while there is still
a slit; a gleam
I have to believe I can
Dream a little dream
By Sarah ©2021
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Tale Weaver – 12.8.21 and Wordle #253; as well as, Carrot Ranch, August 12: Flash Fiction Challenge
Again
Here we go, a rollercoaster ride
Snap! just like that – we’re locked inside
Daily numbers on the rise
Contagion, multiplies
Just as we relax
COVID attacks.
Not again!
Here we
go…
By Sarah ©2021
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Saturday Mix – Lucky Dip, Saturday 14 August
Glow
No longer hiding my bushel.
No longer willing to wait.
No longer content staying silent.
I step out.
Unashamed.
Unabashed.
Unabated.
It’s thoroughly unlike me.
Yes, I’m scared.
Yes, I’m worried.
Yes, I’m filled with trepidation.
But I can’t do it anymore.
I can’t hide.
I can’t pretend.
I can’t ignore who I am.
It’s gone far beyond that.
Inhale,
Exhale.
Just. Breathe.
I can do this.
I have to.
I want to.
I need to.
And so I do.
It’s time for me.
It’s time for more.
It’s time.
Time to glow.
By Sarah ©2021
Lasso The Sun
Lasso the sun?
If only I could
I’d make you stay
If only you would
You captured my heart
But not mine you
A one way river
A dried up slew
I wanted to trap you
Encase you in stone
Secret you away
As mine alone
But you shine brightly
As only I dare
My eyes avert yours
An imperfect pair
I”m left in a wasteland
Of my own making
Lessons learned from
Giving not taking
Now I turn my back
And let you be
You’re just too elusive
This I can see
I’ll admire from afar
Bask only in your light
Lasso the sun?
One day, I might…
By Sarah ©2021
Doorway
I dream of escape
Escape from in here
Here is my nightmare
Nightmare and fear
Spiralling down
Down to the black
Black prefers dark
Dark doesn’t talk back
It’s been a long time
Time has stood still
Still in my mind
Mind been through hell
But now dawn is rising
Rising to light
Light from a doorway
Doorway in sight
I cross the threshold
threshold anew
anew expectations
Expectations of you
Please hold my hand
hand trembling, I go
Go through the opening
Opening so slow
Guide me with love
Love me carefully
Carefully we’ll weave
Weave a journey
By Sarah ©2021
Thwarted
why so perplexed?
don’t you know I’m off my rocker?
this is no palaver
I am indeed what you think:
that stunted shrub
the shadow that follows you
the inky depths of a fetid pool
the feeling that you are being watched
the disturbing coincidence
the sensation of being
off kilter
look – I am there!
and you will find
you have been
thwarted
By Sarah ©2021
Also, Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Saturday Mix – Same Same But Different. Synonyms substituted as follows:
- chair – rocker
- floor – perplex
- tree – shrub
- black- inky
- talk – palaver
The World After
We shake our heads in disbelief
With eyes wide open shut
Our mouths yet still have plenty to say
When will it be enough?
Conspiracy! It’s just fake news
And what about our rights?
Yet COVID hears no words of peace
Continuing its blight
The world after this so far away
Solutions many but none
Cities crumble, people lost
Survival’s the rule of thumb
We’re losing our humanity
Capacity to care
We need to work together
Because none of this is fair
We shake our heads in disbelief
With eyes wide open shut
Our mouths yet still have plenty to say
When will it be discussed?
By Sarah ©2021
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Photo Challenge #376 and Tale Weaver, 5 August 2021
Villain
These villainous acts keep me up at night
My conscience cannot rest
Although I’ve done not one thing wrong
My intentions do contest
Infatuation blazes in
This yearning heart of mine
It’s criminal indeed to know
The secrets that I hide
Each wretched day, I live a lie
A smile pasted on my face
Eyes dart ‘round for just one glimpse
Yet oft, there is no trace
This cursed blight splintering
Dreams better to put to bed
The kicker is, none of it’s real
It’s all inside my head
By Sarah ©2021
Oasis
You love me like rain.
In a downpour of affection.
Torrential.
Flooding.
Life-giving.
I am thirsty and you are my oasis.
Until you are not.
Now, I’m in drought.
Alone with a withered heart.
And I hate you for that…
By Sarah ©2021
Sammi Scribbles, Weekend Writing Prompt #220 – Oasis ; and Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Opposing Forces – 31 July 2021
Monster of Every Story
I am the monster of every story.
That’s right.
I am.
A catacomb mind.
A labyrinth.
I have.
With ghoulish glee.
A spectre.
I see.
Hateful stares
Catch you unawares
I smile.
Threatening vows
Suspicions roused
I laugh.
The pleasure’s mine
Twisting your twine.
I unravel.
Oh yes,
I am the monster of every story.
That is, every story
That’s mine.
By Sarah ©2021
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, First Line Friday – 2 Jul 2021
Pain
It was with a swath of nays,
I vocalised the strongest neigh
It’s like I never was in
P
A
I
N
It was nothing,
See me?
In the window pane?
It’s nothing.
That’s right…
Me.
I’m nothing.
By Sarah ©2021
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie , Saturday Mix – Double Take, 26 June 2021
Sky’s High
Unfolding. Night creeps.
Aglow, refresh bewitched minds
A piece of sky’s high
By Sarah ©2021
Ronovan Writes, Weekly Haiku Challenge #357 – high and refresh and Mindlovemisery’s Menageries, Photo Challenge #365
Apart
On greasy winds
they float.
Shirtless.
Shapes of
nonesuch, making
their return.
Easily obnubilating
My silent
screams.
The apartment of
my mind
Apart from man.
By Sarah ©2021
Beautiful Mistake
Line by line
I craft.
I dig into
The darkest parts
Of my mind.
Seeking a beautiful mistake.
Of my mind,
The darkest parts,
I dig into.
I craft.
Line by line.
By Sarah ©2021
Image credit Pobble365Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Sunday Writing Prompt – 9 May 2021
Solitudinarian
I am a solitudinarian.
I don’t need anyone.
I don’t need anything.
Away with you.
Be gone.
I am a solitudinarian.
Hear me when I say,
“I am perfectly fine.
I like things just the way they are.”
I do.
I am a solitudinarian.
I answer my own questions.
I interpret my replies.
What is the sound of one hand clapping?
It is I.
I am a solitudinarian.
Yet emptiness is taking over.
Is this all there is?
I admit.
I’m lonely.
I am a solitudinarian.
But I need you.
By Sarah ©2021
Weekend Writing Prompt #208 – Solitudinarian
Melted
I put on a front.
But trying to freeze him out
I find, I am gone.
My heart – already melted.
Now, there is no looking back.
By Sarah ©2021
Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie, Saturday Mix – Opposing Forces 8 May 2021
Boiling
cloak myself in white
hiding behind purest smiles
beneath, red blood boils
By Sarah ©2021
Forever Chasing Fridays
A shadowed tree with
leaves hanging
like twisted crêpes
across the darkened park.
I’m insecure.
I’ll admit it.
Aren’t most girls in
this day and age?
The masculine presence
taints our safety,
like cherry blossoms
exhumed after the fall.
No piquant thoughts
allowed here.
How awful to be bittersweet –
forever chasing Fridays.
By Sarah ©2021
By Sarah 